In Threes

"Dreams of Three", watercolor, 9" x 6" © Bernadette E. Kazmarski

I regularly write about my personal experience of the losses of my own cats on my website The Creative Cat. I first published this post on The Creative Cat on January 5, 2026.

The strangest things, and where you find them, can be a touchstone for a flow of memories, of moments that show strength and love and bring a depth to our relationship with our animal companions though their loss is clearly imminent. Another in the series of “Attachments”, the bond we feel with everyday things that have some connection, however distant, with the life of and our relationship with an animal companion who’s gone on to their next life.

black cat — Notwithstanding the purple background, I was totally surprised by how many colors showed up in Mr. Sunshine’s eye.

My old violet fleece bathrobe has seen more than its share of times good and bad over the past 20 years or so. Yet every autumn when I slip it on for the first cold morning it’s as if I didn’t take a six-month break from it. It’s in the background of many photos with cats on my lap or hanging in the bathroom with cats on the sink or cabinet, as it was for Mr. Sunshine in the photo above from 2013. The thing is indestructible so I’m glad I like it, and also glad it’s indestructible for the memories it holds, physically and emotionally.

The first time I put it on this autumn 2025 I put my hands in the pockets out of habit and felt some little hard objects in the bottom of the right-hand pocket, the pocket I’d use if I was carrying something in my right hand and dropped whatever that was into the pocket to free up my hands. Often these things are little hardwares from some enterprising morning project, or something I found in one place that needed to go to another. I couldn’t determine what they were with my fingertips so I pulled out three of them and found they were Greenies dental treats.

My cats love the catnip flavor, and along with handing them out as regular treats with a purpose, they like them enough I also used them to test or entice appetites in the recent years of palliative care for cats. Because they would always take one the test was for how strong their appetite if they turned down a meal. If they would eat one treat or more I could just observe them presuming their inappetence was digestive, or give them some treatments for nausea which would pick up their appetite so they would resume eating. If not, I’d go to other measures, taking a temperature, checking hydration, looking for possible sources of pain.

I would have dropped a few in that pocket to take upstairs to one of the cats confined in the bathroom for observation, or overnight so they would have food available and a cozy familiar place, and so that I’d be able to check them first thing without looking for them. The treats were something they would crunch even if they had no appetite for regular food. I remembered the worry and sometimes fear associated with this circumstance: please eat the treat. Was it a bad morning? Was it one of a series of bad days that seemed to be leading to a conclusion? Or were they just a little off? So many mornings like this since 2022, who might have been the intended recipient of the treats who ended up not eating them?

Counting backward, not Mr. Max, I kept some in the studio just for him and Morty and he was never confined to the bathroom. Basil? No, the only time Basil was confined to the bathroom he managed against all odds to break out. Mimi? Her time of being in the bathroom was during summer, not the time I’d wear this bathrobe.

Mr. Sunshine's not feeling well today. — Mr. Sunshine’s not feeling well today.

It was Mr. Sunshine, and I felt instinctively this was true. And it was likely from his last day, March 1, 2024, when he did not come downstairs right away and I went back up with treats to see how he reacted to them. He didn’t eat them, nor any food that morning. I had dropped the treats back in the pocket after he had turned his face away from one I was offering. His temperature was slightly elevated, but he got up and came downstairs, before the chain of events leading up to his death that afternoon.

The treats remained in the pocket, forgotten, until the following autumn 2025 when I found them in there. I remember pulling them out then and looking at them in the palm of my hand, deciding to toss them in the trash because they’d surely be stale, but deciding instead to keep them for that memory of that day.

The treats are still in my pocket. They aren’t hurting anything. When my hand finds them in the bottom of the right-hand pocket I remember Mr. Sunshine, and then others, and those mornings, and days, overnights, that I carried a few to the bathroom in my pocket. I don’t remember my worry and fear or even their losses, I remember their strength, and their trust, and their determination to live each moment they could knowing I would help them do that, and the increasing depth of the bond between us as we faced this together.

In Threes

What Mr. Sunshine's flower looks like now. — What Mr. Sunshine’s flower looks like now.

So I remembered Mr. Sunshine this morning when I went out to the garden for my yoga in the bitter cold, my hands in the pockets of the robe, fingering the treats in the right pocket. I stood for my postures in front of Mr. Sunshine’s flower, feeling very connected to him, and then each of the others, and the four siblings in groups, from the photos I worked with the day before for my “Friday Four and More” photos.

Three Birds

As I worked my warrior poses, one hand down on my shin and the other stretched up toward the sky as I turned to look at it, a trio of birds flew overhead, headed west. Immediately I thought of the varied groups of three who would nap together. While the four siblings did often gather together, a selection of three was the second most frequent nap collection, and how many sketches and photos I have of three of them together—three of them curled together on the bed was the very first sketch in my three-year series of daily sketches.

I continued my posture, returning upright with my arms outstretched, then leaning down the other way looking up at the opposite hand in the air, and saw the three birds again flying above my rooftop and past my upraised hand heading east this time. They were circling overhead and I lost count of my moves for the distraction thinking about them as the three birds passed overhead again and I nearly tipped over as I followed them, looking up and around from that angle.

I moved to my tree poses, standing in front of Mr. Sunshine’s flower and smiling, thinking of those naps of three, watching the light cold breeze move the bits of tattered nylon on the petals, then push it around a bit in one direction, then the other, wondering how much longer this flower would be able to keep spinning. I got my answer less than a minute later when a quick little gust sent the flower spinning, then slowing, then back to fluttering tatters and little movements back and forth. I’m including this video I took at the time just because, and it includes the quietness of the moment, bird sounds and breezes, but there’s no reason you need to watch the entire 1:45.

How close I feel to them in those moments. It’s interesting how the strangest of things, and where you find them, can bring on a whole review of memories.

watercolor of three cats — “Dreams of Three”, watercolor, 9″ x 6″ © Bernadette E. Kazmarski

Dreams of Three

Giuseppe, Mewsette and Mr. Sunshine were all dreaming very deeply on my desk, curled and tucked neatly together. I saw swirls, and began to visualize how I would interpret those swirls. No heavy lines, I wanted the darkness of their faces, where the swirls began, fading in swirls and marbles and fading lines to the lightness of their shapes. Somehow, speckles would be a part of it. I took a photo, below, and pondered my assignment.

Little Visits

Stories of sensing my cats’ presence after they’ve gone to their next life

sketch of two cats — Two in Sun and Shadow, charcoal and watercolor, 9″ x 6.5″ © B.E. Kazmarski

This post on The Creative Cat includes the text as well as a video with my reading of the stories illustrated with photos and art.

Click the image to read and listen to Little Visits.

And a note from “The Creative Cat” where I originally published this essay, and where I write about pet loss just about every Sunday…

Thank you for following our grief journey after losing seven members of our feline family.

I hope sharing our experiences have helped you in some way, as sharing my experiences with you helps me.

You can read all the articles related to their losses by tapping one of the images here, in the side bar or in articles about pet loww. You can also read all my articles about my own losses in the category “Pet Loss in the First Person”

All images and text © 2022-2025 Bernadette E. Kazmarski • www.custompetmemorialvotives.com

All images and content are copyrighted and may not be used or reproduced in any way without my written permission. Please contact me if you are interested in using any of my content.

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January 7, 2026January 7, 2026

An Acrylic Suncatcher for Henry

Some customers asked for a less fragile item, and for those I use a 6″ clear acrylic circle with a slightly rounded edge. The extra inch of space, plus the lack of a bevel, allows far more space for display and works well for multiple subjects, larger dogs, and even a full cat, not just the face.

The acrylic is lighter than the glass suncatchers too so isn’t likely to weigh down the suction-cup holder you might use on a window.

The acrylic costs less than glass, and shipping is a little less because it’s lighter. You don’t get that rainbow refraction from the bevel on the glass suncatcher but it’s a little less expensive all around, and sometimes that’s what counts.

Henry

Henry was a beloved community cat who everyone knew. He did have an “owner” but that family preferred he stayed outdoors. That gave Henry even more time to sit on a porch and look pitiful until someone came out with a dish of food and loads of affection.

When he died a friend commissioned me to paint his portrait for her and also wanted a second one for her friend, another of Henry’s big fans. This suncatcher features the pastel portrait, and I also sketched a charcoal portrait of the same pose.

Henry's two portraits. — Henry’s two portraits.

Shipping to your recipient

And as always if you’re sending this suncatcher to a friend, I can ship it to that person.

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November 12, 2025

Custom Pet Suncatchers, Thoughtful Holiday Gifts Memorial or Otherwise

New rectangular and square custom suncatchers.

Custom Pet Memorial Suncatchers as Thoughtful Holiday Gifts

Custom Suncatchers in Glass or Acrylic

A suncatcher can hang on any window, or a mirror or any place you want to see the image of your beloved animal companion.

And they also make unique customized gifts even when they aren’t in sympathy for a loss.

What recipients have said:

“I have her suncatcher hanging in my kitchen window. I stand there and look at her every morning while I drink my coffee.”

Anonymous recipient, in person

I want to thank you for the very special, beautiful glass ornament suncatcher …It brought a tear to my eye that day and the day I hung it up in the sunlight. You really have a very special talent.

Anonymous recipient, in a letter

Ancient History

I began my design ideas for suncatchers the same way I did with many of my handmade gifts, wanting to see my art on gift items I saw in stores. In the early 90s I bought a 3.25″ x 3.25″ square bevel-edge clear suncatcher with a kitten etched in the center, which I not only liked but found inspiring. I had lots of pencil and ink sketches that would work on things like this. I held that idea all these years knowing I’d want my artwork on that beveled glass somehow, someday.

That etched kitten suncatcher from the early 90s is pretty battered by now.

And like most of my memorial gift items, my suncatchers began as personal gifts for friends who’d lost their animal companions. Using the standards I’d set up to create the images on my Custom Pet Memorial Votives I was ready to make good on that suncatcher idea.

Scroll down to read through information about each suncatcher

(I do seem to have a lot of gab around each of the products. I’m including customer feedback and results and experiences with customers at my vendor events and from sales in general to help you decide, especially if you are ordering a gift for someone else.)

I began with thick 5″ glass circles with a deep beveled edge, your animal companion’s image in the center, so that sun could shine through the bevel and refract light into rainbows.

Some customers asked for a less fragile item, and for those I use a 6″ clear acrylic circle with a slightly rounded edge. The extra inch of space, plus the lack of a bevel, allows more space for display and works well for multiple subjects, larger dogs, and even a full cat, not just the face. The acrylic costs less than glass, and shipping is a little less because it’s lighter, so it’s a little less expensive too.

I still wanted the square shape, though, partly to see my original idea, and to offer an alternative shape, and because not all images fit well in a circle.

The company I buy from has 4″ squares which would seem to have less presentation space than the 5″ circle so I debated, then bought some to work with. The outside dimension is smaller but the corners allow the image to be almost as large as the circle. Below is the square, modeled by Buckwheat, whose portrait I painted years ago and whose person encouraged me to use his image.

4" square beveled glass pet memorial suncatcher. — 4″ square beveled glass pet memorial suncatcher.

I had another idea, of course…the company also carried a graceful arch-top rectangle I’d wanted to try but found they wouldn’t be carrying it after current inventory ran out.

I had been looking at their 3″ x 5″ rectangle and also debated because it’s a difficult shape to fit, but when the company suggested that shape as an alternative—all their customer service people use all their products so you get the best real advice—I decided to go with it.

The first time I offered one at the Blessing of the Animals that vertical rectangle was an instant hit and I had several orders. At one of my vendor events this summer a mother ordered two for her daughter to depict her daughter’s beloved hounds, growing older now, and both in upright sitting positions. Both dogs looked marvelous with the image focusing entirely on their tall, graceful sitting posture.

The image area on this shape is 2.25″ x 4.25″. This suncatcher is modeled by Pixie, a beloved rescue kitty of a friend in rescue who’s been the recipient of just about all my new ideas; there’s a lot of loss in rescue.

Pixie, a 3″ x 5" beveled rectangle glass suncatcher. — Pixie, a 3″ x 5″ beveled rectangle glass suncatcher.

Thoughtful Holiday Gifts

The rectangle and square are just as popular as the original circle and all make thoughtful holiday gifts whether as a memorial or for the person who loves to see their pet on everything.

Standard with each suncatcher

I use my skills as an artist in traditional media and on computer to remove backgrounds, touch up lighting and composition, and add a background color or pattern that complements the subject (see Choosing a Photo…).

A sympathy card is also included. The one shown below is available with every suncatcher. You can visit my page of Animal Sympathy Cards to see a selection of others. If I am to ship directly to the recipient you can give me a note which I will write inside the card.

The price includes shipping, whether to you or your recipient, or if you are an animal professional to your practice or drop-shipped to your client, within the continental US. I have rates for international shipping.

I include a care and use card with each suncatcher. This card has a link to this website.

Little extras

Adding an extra subject, a special background pattern like a favorite blanket or chair are extra, usually no more than $10 per addition. Adding a name or other brief text is optional and is included.

Suncatchers are kept in confidence

I photograph each Suncatcher I make for my records and to keep the details of what it looked like for my reference. I never use a custom memorial item in any public venue, whether for display or self-promotion, without permission of both the giver and the recipient.

Order a Custom Suncatcher

Visit Suncatchers to order your thoughtful holiday gifts. As I mention above with the notecard, if your suncatcher is a gift for someone else I can ship it to them with a note from you.

You can also read about Other Memorial Gifts, Animal Sympathy Cards and Commissioned Pet Portraits.

All images and text © 2022-2025 Bernadette E. Kazmarski • www.custompetmemorialvotives.com

All images and content are copyrighted and may not be used or reproduced in any way without my written permission. Please contact me if you are interested in using any of my content.

HOME

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October 28, 2025October 28, 2025

Metaphors and Memories

I regularly write about my personal experience of the losses of my own cats on my website The Creative Cat. That includes Mr. Sunshine who once stood on this fence and sniffed this flower pinwheel on a day he was feeling great, a few months before he died on March 1, 2024.

This post is an entry in my series “Attachments” on www.TheCreativeCat.net about the things with which we develop attachments because they have something, however distantly connected, with the life and loss of one of our animal companions.

I first published this post on The Creative Cat on October 12, 2025.

Last Wednesday morning I looked once again at the increasingly tattered state of “Mr. Sunshine’s flower,” the flower pinwheel on the picket fence by the garden that I associate with him. A sweet breezy morning would normally have the flower spinning madly, instead it had a number of false starts before it actually began to spin. Still, the flower brought back the memory of that magic October afternoon in 2023 when Mimi had hopped up on the fence in the sun, then Mr. Sunshine and Giuseppe followed. I took a series of photos and brief videos, but one of the photos was immediately a forever memory, its brilliance still held in this ragged nylon and wire pinwheel flower, the memory always warming my heart and making me smile. You can see the cat in the middle, Mr. Sunshine, blissfully sniffing the flower pinwheel. He was so cool.

Mimi, Mr. Sunshine and Giuseppe on the pallet and fence on a gorgeous October afternoon.

And a respite in the line of losses; we had already lost their siblings/daughter Mewsette and Jelly Bean in June and July, and this was shortly before the symptoms of Giuseppe’s meningioma started neurological symptoms and we’d lose him a little less than two months later, Mr. Sunshine would join them the following March, and their mother Mimi the following August. But this one perfect October afternoon all were well and happy, playing in the sun, exploring in the shade, enjoying their time out here.

The flower had survived since 2022, outside the entire time, but on this day a twinge of sadness mingled with the joy knowing the flower wouldn’t last much longer before all the petals were tattered and it stood, still, in its place on the fence. The word “metaphor” came to mind followed slowly by “memories” as I thought about all the times I’d looked at that flower, checked to see it was still there, stopped to watch it spinning, feeling Mr. Sunshine’s presence and visualizing him in image after image, but always knowing it wouldn’t last forever, and how the flower’s decline in many ways was a metaphor for his.

This essay began writing itself in my head and even as I began to open the notes app on my phone to use voice to text to record my thoughts as I often do now I was headed into the house and just went right to my computer and began writing. When it was finished I decided to record it and make an accompanying video and title the whole project, “Metaphors and Memories” which is linked immediately below, and the essay itself below the video. It’s been a while since I’ve had the time, the focus and presence of mind to be able to produce one of these little videos, but I knew it was just as important for my own healing that I take the time for that creative effort. I hope that in any way it’s helpful to you too.

Metaphors and Memories

The essay

This breezy, sunny, post-rain morning in the garden I noticed that Mr. Sunshine’s pinwheel flower was having a little trouble starting to spin.

For nearly two years since that wonderful photo of him and Mimi and Giuseppe on the fence where he is coolly sniffing the flower in the sun and color of October, that flower, tied to the fence post where it can always be seen and catch the breeze, has been spinning at the slightest provocation, and I feel Mr. Sunshine near me. It has always had a little regular squeak when it spins and when I was indoors at my desk, even at night with the windows open, I could hear that squeak and smiled to think of Mr. Sunshine out there, doing his thing. The flower had become one of my “attachments,” those inanimate objects I come to associate with cats I’ve lost so that the things become precious to me as a stand-in for the feline I’m missing.

But as with all things in my garden and in life, someday the flower will slow down, falter, and then, eventually, stop, just as Mr. Sunshine did after two years of holding off the cancerous masses in his abdomen so he could support each of his siblings in their last steps and get every last moment due to him in this life.

This once-colorful flower now has a fourth tattered petal which is probably why it doesn’t catch the breeze as well as it has, even recently. In September 2024, about six months after he’d left us, one of the petals was ripped through and it wouldn’t spin for missing that resistance to the breeze. I had a second flower that had gotten pretty tattered in its first summer and winter so I put it into one of my planters where it could be colorful even if it didn’t spin. I pulled one of the petals from that flower to replace the damaged one on Mr. Sunshine’s flower.

For a few days after a windy, icy storm in January 2025 it was lost under ice and snow, only the plastic stake that held it left tied to the fence; I was bereft and a little panicked. But I saw a scrap of color when the snow began to melt a few days later and revived it, slipping it back on the stick and replacing yet another petal.

By early spring I regularly found the flower on the brick path between the garden beds at an angle that told me it was blown off and landed face down. When I slipped it back on I could see that the center of the flower that gripped the spike it spun on had worn out and no longer tightly gripped it. I slipped a bit of a broken plastic knife I used as a plant marker into the tip of the post that it spun on and that has held it in place through storms and bird landings since then.

But four petals have tears in them, and I have no more petals to replace the one that no longer catches the breeze. I no longer hear that endearing little squeak. I know the time will come when the flower will cease to be able to perform its task of colorful entertainment in the garden and memory for me. But my intention with everything that goes into my garden is to love and support it while it lives out its natural life. Life is a cycle, the vegetables I plant, the bricks I pick up free from others who no longer need them, even the wood of the raised beds and plant stakes, untreated, it eventually breaks down and becomes part of the soil.

The metaphor matches Mr. Sunshine’s journey, and mine with him. He put everything into continuing life, and I found working treatments as palliative care, both of us working together, until life was no longer sustainable and he joined his siblings in their next life.

As with Mr. Sunshine, I will no more keep that flower beyond its abilities nor hasten its demise than I did with Mr. Sunshine. Knowing me and my attachments, when too many of the petals are ripped and the flower no longer spins at all, I will move it to a safe space to hold as a vessel for memory until such time as I no longer feel that connection with Mr. Sunshine through the flower.

And a note from “The Creative Cat” where I originally published this essay, and where I write about pet loss just about every Sunday…

Thank you for following our grief journey after losing seven members of our feline family.

I hope sharing our experiences have helped you in some way, as sharing my experiences with you helps me.

All images and text © 2022-2025 Bernadette E. Kazmarski • www.custompetmemorialvotives.com

All images and content are copyrighted and may not be used or reproduced in any way without my written permission. Please contact me if you are interested in using any of my content.

HOME

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August 7, 2025

A Custom Background for Pearl’s Votive

Working with your supplied photo or artwork, I use my decades of pet portraiture on paper and canvas and my Photoshop skills to prepare the image to fit the votive. I remove background distractions and correct distortions if necessary, and add a color or gentle pattern that suits your pet, pulling ideas from the supplied photos.

Sometimes a custom background is part of the design, either the background in the provided photo, another scenic background, or a pattern. Pearl loved sleeping on the patterned porch chair and it was in the photo I used, enough of it to be able to trim sections out of the provided photo and blend the sections together in a continuous pattern. I placed Pearl on top of the pattern with the section of it that was under her face included with her. Below are views of each side and the back.

And here is what the votive looks like when the candle is lit.

Pearl's votive lighted front. — Pearl’s votive lighted front.

Pearl's votive lighted back. — Pearl’s votive lighted back.

Customizations cost $10.00 extra for a specific background, another subject, or text, like a name and dates, or a tribute incorporated into the design. You’ll find these listed as “Extra Services” in the drop-downs when you order, but you can check with me before you order if you have questions.

The sample votive you see here was ordered by one friend to give to another, and both parties gave me permission to share the images. I never use any image of a custom item without permission.

July 30, 2025

Commissioned Portrait: Gypsy, 1996

"Gypsy", pastel on canson mi-tientes paper, 17" x 13", 1996 © Bernadette E. Kazmarski

Gypsy was just about to turn 21 when I met her, and the challenge was for her human to choose one position out of all those years of companionship by which to represent her. She chose Gypsy’s favorite nap spot, right where the sheers come together at the sliding glass door, holding one side of the sheers open so she could glance outside now and then. She had no pictures of this position, and of course Gypsy did not cooperate by posing, so we pieced it together with other pictures of Gypsy plus a picture of a pillow placed in this spot behind the curtains.

At the time my oldest cat was 15, but I know now that when you live with a cat this long, or any animal or person, they tend to find a fixed place in your memory at a certain time in their life, and when you think of them, that place in time is the face, posture, even time of day and season you visualize. Longer-lived loved ones may change their place as time goes on, but we always have that moment to reference. So it was with Gypsy, and we decided to soften the signs of her age, the deep-set eyes in a gaunt face, slightly matted fur, apparent stiffness and brought her back a few years into her teens or maybe a few years younger.

I remember working very hard to get Gypsy’s calico spots, and how they all blended together, correct, and going back and forth over the edges until it looked like fur and not just stray lines, and the little area on her hip where her fur parted with the curve of her body.

After she lost Gypsy to a brain tumor not long after we finished, her companion told me that she had hung the portrait by the door and every morning she said goodbye to the portrait and greeted Gypsy every day when she came home. A couple of years later as she battled breast cancer Gypsy’s presence in her portrait was important to her healing. I was glad to know that something I had done had brought comfort to someone in time of need.

A quiet favorite

Gypsy’s portrait has always quietly been one of my favorites. The pretty calico, the simple scene, the typical feline habit, were all just so real to me right then, and through the years I honored this by including her portrait in my brochure and using little thumbnails of her image as navigation buttons and welcome images on various versions of my websites, knowing other people would like Gypsy too. This is one of the older portraits for which I only have basic photos for, and sadly I can’t find Gypsy’s companion to catch up on the news and photograph her portrait again. But I’m so glad to have preserved a moment for Gypsy and her person, and for the lesson I learned about finding a place in time to remember.

This portrait is painted with my first set of Rembrandt soft pastels and Conté pastel pencils on Canson mi-tientes paper, on the smooth side. Looking back on it, I don’t know how I managed to capture the level of detail but I guess visualizing your finished piece helps give you a goal in figuring out how to make what’s on your paper look like what’s in your head!

More about Custom Commissioned Portraits

Visit the Portraits page here on Custom Pet Memorial Votives.

See all posts about Custom Commissioned Portraits.

Read about other Commissioned Portraits and Featured Artwork
on The Creative Cat

If you’d like to read more about artwork as I develop it, about my current portraits and art assignments and even historic portraits and paintings, I feature commissioned portrait or other piece of artwork on Wednesday. I also feature artwork which has not been commissioned, especially my paintings of my own cats. Choose the categories featured artwork.

July 22, 2025

Hear the Echoes

I regularly write about my personal experience of the losses of my own cats on my website The Creative Cat. That includes Basil with the big round eyes and the scary vegetables behind him who I lost in December 2024. I publish daily photos there just about every day and in each post include photos from that day in previous years, sometimes all the way back to 2009, when I started The Creative Cat.

This essay is about the experience of scrolling through months and years and decades of photos of my family of felines in one of those posts, always an emotional experience but, “Now, as I scroll down any daily photo post, I hear the echoes of the lives we lived, the literal sounds and also the movements, the interactions and emotions, and I’m grateful and joyful that they all shared my life. The photos come to life and move with the memories…”

I’m making some marinara today, and all alone in the kitchen. A couple of years ago I was never alone! Basil was always a kitchen cat, and even after we lost the siblings and then Mimi, he was still there, probably feeling as alone as I was after the usual kitchen full of all the cats we loved. He would sit on the cabinet or the table with those big eyes, always a little bit of doubt in his expression, as if he might not belong, or I might not love him and pay attention to him.

On the contrary, he got it all. We had some wonderful bonding moments then, lots of affection and kisses. I was grateful each time for the distraction from my own thoughts. And each time, I gave Basil lots of praise for overcoming his doubts and asking for what he wanted. He was so brave. Whatever had planted that doubt in him, each time it came up it was a struggle that I could even see happening, but every time he overcame it. I will always be so grateful for deciding, instead of wanting to leave my bathroom open after steadily fostering in there because it was easier for me in my studio, to instead say I’d take the 14-week-old kitten on the shelter kill list for “bad temperament,” in 2014. Not just for saving his life, but so that we could end up sharing a life. I know Basil loved and trusted me, as I did him, and the thought of his trust, trust in me, still makes my heart swell with love.

I’ve been missing him a lot. Not just because he was my most recent loss. I could almost understand each of the siblings’ passings, and I had actually been grieving Mimi in advance for a few years. Basil walked the line between friendly and feral, between Mimi and the siblings’ overwhelmingly social purrsonalities and the more cautious Bella, Hamlet, Mariposa and even Sienna. He was the last of the cats who moved around the house with me, who was always ready for love, and I knew, and he knew, that our future had him moving to the lead position in our feline family, and he was already learning to put his fears aside and actually be the greeting cat of the household.

And then he was ill, and then he was gone. Neither of us was ready. I had dropped everything in October, garden, house, working on my websites, even cooking some days, and spent all my time with him in those last two months. But not even that would ever be enough.

The kitchen is where I still find him now, I feel him sitting on the cabinet behind me, waiting for a taste of whatever, or on the table, waiting for pets. I don’t look to see he’s not there in body. Even though sometimes it makes me profoundly sad, I picture him as he would be in that moment, in the now, if he was here in more than spirit.

My websites were offline during the entire time he was experiencing his illness, and I almost feel as if I was silenced by some malevolent spirit because here is where I’ve always brought my grief in my feline losses. Sharing on social networks was not the same. But some time this year, possibly autumn, to track and follow the course of his illness in a series of posts, I’ll share his story.

About this photo

This photo is so Basil it just wipes away all my tears. When I took the photo I had no idea how our future would turn, but in this moment I was planning on loving Basil in life for the next decade, or more. I will go with that plan, and enjoy all the silly photos of him, some of which I took while he was pretty seriously ill.

Here’s what I said about it last year:

Basil is a little fearful, and just lately the presence of fruits and vegetables behind him seemingly no matter where he goes has really been making him uneasy. Where did they come from all of a sudden? And why? And why can’t he get away from them? What might be their ulterior motive?

Basil is clearly overthinking this. Really, he’s just been sleeping on the table each day and that’s a new habit. The fruits and vegetables, though not always the same ones, are there all the time. But there is no convincing Basil, only constantly reassuring him with pets and kisses.

Sometimes I think he’s manipulating me. Purrhaps Mariposa has taught him a few new things.

And photos from previous years too

Now, as I scroll down any daily photo post, I hear the echoes of the lives we lived, the literal sounds and also the movements, the interactions and emotions, and I’m grateful and joyful that they all shared my life. The photos come to life and move with the memories. To see the five of them together, growing younger as I scroll down, Basil becomes a kitten again! Birds yelling at Mewsette, Jelly Bean in a box, Mimi in the rhododendron in 32 different views, Mary petting all four of them at once, Mariposa climbing the screen door, cantaloupe?! Giuseppe talking, Sunshine in a bag in a bag, wow, so much to remember and love. Share that with me.

Below, lots of happy memories from previous years! Look at those five just below!

From around this date in past years

All Lined Up, 2022

five black cats in a line — All lined up and waiting for lunch.

It’s been a while since this wonderful family lined up for a meal. This was once a daily occurrence and I’m thrilled to see them do it again today! Wish I’d had my better camera, but this will do.

I let each cat, fosters and all, choose where in the kitchen they want to eat. When these were all younger, after we lost our tortie girls in 2012 and before so many fosters came along, they lined up just like this daily.

Now each of them gets a mid-day meal and a chance at the food puzzle, but they don’t always eat at the same time. I’ll have to try to remember the magic from today.

Mimi chose some genetically advantaged boy cats to create this group. That was before her time with me. Can you see similarities between her facial features and each of her “kittens’ ” features?

Below: lunchtime!!

~~~

From Instagram

Hearing the word CAT!! in every bird language from all the trees around the backyard as Mewsette quietly strolls on a sunny Saturday morning having no idea of her impact.

Outdoor Studio. Girls are inspecting my set up as I make a few more Scratch Your Claws Here cat mats for the Carnegie spring market tomorrow afternoon! They’ll have to settle down before I get out the paint. Hope these things are dry by tomorrow!

This week’s #boxpawty — Jelly Bean tries to fit himself into the (recycled) box I’m getting ready to ship with a customer’s order, he decided he wanted to go and visit his housepanther cousins from New Jersey, and have a vacation on Cape May! Now that takes paw-lanning!

From around this date in past years

Pretty in Pink, 2021

black cat with pink rhododendron — Mimi makes the scene.

Mimi liked the rhododendron so much this year that she willingly posed around it, unlike last year when I couldn’t get her to get near it when I had my camera—in fact, you can even see last year’s non-event below. She even had a little routine of posing and interacting with the blossoms. Above, she gazes tranquilly at the flowers. Below, she gets a good whiff of them!

The bush was especially lovely this year, with even more blossoms than last year. I did a little judicious trimming, and this is the third year since the maple trees are gone, and Rhody is feeling good. Mimi chooses one more pose with the rhododendron and forget-me-not flowers.

I took these at the end of May when I was about to move the cats to the farm, so I didn’t have the chance to share them before now—along with a number of other photos! But Mimi deserves her due for the inspiring photo shoot we had. When she’s done, she marks it in particular cat style, with a thorough and extended face rub on the edge of the porch.

I think Mimi had a good idea for waiting, though, because the fallen blossoms added to the beauty of the scene. I don’t remember the fallen blossoms making that much of a show in the past, but Mimi made the most of them all around her tiny paws. When it was all done, she settled down on the edge of the porch with the angry rabbit to gaze upon her little paradise.

~~~

From Instagram

It’s a hot one out there! Keep yourself and your kitties cool, put a few ice cubes in everyone’s water, and find a nice geranium to provide some shade.

The #housepanther receiving line for guests to our house. Aunt Mary stopped by today, a favorite because she brings some of their favorite food. They know her as soon as she walks in the door.

From around this date in past years

Through the Magic Rhododendron Portal, 2020

One of the things I love about living with cats is watching them explore new things in their environment in minute detail, then find a way to occupy it and own it, whether it’s a box, cat tree, new piece of furniture, or a small section of the yard, especially for Mimi. Once my niece and I removed the ivy that was covering the entire front yard last year (well, she did all that!), we spread plastic and wood chips from the trees I’d had cut down and my original rock garden with a few short stone walls in a couple of places was visible again. I remembered building all that the spring after I’d moved in here and was happy to see the structure I’d set up once again ready for growing things. And for felines!

Mimi was ready to explore. Another wall to use as a catwalk! And curl up for naps on sun-warmed stones, even in May. These photos were taken on May 10 and 13 as Mimi acquainted herself with the wall and walked beneath the portal (rhododendron) to the “other side”.

That was a totally cool experience. And that rock she’s standing on? It’s so nice and warm under her paws…it was in the sun all afternoon…so of course it was the purrfect spot for a little feline enjoyment. First to mark the stones as belonging to Mimi.

And then a little bath…

…and then a nap with lots of toe stretching and head turning upside down.

We’ve revisited the wall regularly since then, and I’ve tried so hard, alas, in vain, to get a good photo of Mimi exiting the portal on the wall. But these minute little happinesses are so important to cats. I know they are part of what makes Mimi content each day and ensures her continued physical and behavioral health. And mine too, as I follow her around with my camera searching for the best way to interpret her pose. I can’t be as free when we’re out in the front yard because I need to keep a close eye on her and on our surroundings, but it’s worth missing a photo now and then to ensure her safety.

I’ve been enjoying my Mimi Monday posts and sharing all these photos of her I take outdoors. Let me know what you think!

~~~

Yes, I’ve been MIA for over a week, even for those of you who follow me on Instagram and other social media! Several things came together at once and needed my time before the end of June. I wanted to relieve the strain on my eyes until my new glasses are ready (July 1!) and stay away from posting long enough to get the other projects done and get back to posting regularly. I’d actually intended to share that I’d be “away” for a few days but even ran out of time for that. I always miss posting, and I’m always glad when I can come back to The Creative Cat.

~~~

From Instagram, last week to Monday

June 20

Boys are trying to like cantaloupe, because that’s what I’m eating. I’m trying to get to know my new cellphone, because my old old one could not update past android 5 and had to be replaced. What better way than to photograph my cats? It’s a win-win. The cantaloupe was a no-go, though.

Really? You eat this stuff?
My new phone fits a lot more apps too. Camera is good, but nothing is like my DSLR. Still going to be fun.

Mariposa is feeling this purrfect summer morning.

June 22

The Four Housecats of the Apocalypse are planning my day because they are coming to work with me today. Wait, how is that any different…

June 24

Yeah, my hair’s doing something pretty fantastic this morning, isn’t it?

Whisker Wednesday at the window. Mariposa just generally has a lot of hair, something we have in common on humid mornings.

Mr. Sunshine is having a great morning. He’s in a bag, in a bag!
Don’t worry, one side of each handle is pulled loose.

June 29

I’m sorry I opened the refrigerator door overnight.
I still get my breakfast though, right?

From around this date in past years

Now That’s a Nap, 2019

That little row of teeny teeth and then the FANGS. Basil is a purrfessional at napping in interesting positions. He always starts out in pretty normal positions, then at some point he lets it all hang out.

From Instagram

It’s the pre-breakfast wrestling match to enhance the appetite. It’s how they work off their excitement while I prepare 10 bowls of food. Mariposa wriggles across the floor on her back under Jelly Bean’s face and boxes his nose with those big white mittens until he engages. If she doesn’t, he starts vigorously licking her face and before long they are wrestling all over the floor. Kitty communication is a very interesting process!

A year ago I had trapped Mariposa as an adult along with a colony of feral cats at an abandoned house and she began her journey to socialization. All other adults went to a friend’s farm. Mariposa was clearly related but somehow let me know she wasn’t like them. She is very pleased to be a socialized cat with her own house and a human she can manipulate and a family of felines who love her despite her odd coloring 😉.

Photos shared in past years

Some Good Naps, 2018

This black object is completely identifiable as Hamlet, enjoying this purrfect afternoon.

I actually got an inexpensive smartphone with inexpensive service to have for my travels over the past week, as well as just to use as a cell phone. I’m trying out the camera along with the service, and napping kitties are a purrfect subject. Not sure the camera really cuts it, though. But I had fun with it nonetheless.

Looks like there’s a UBO on my bed. They show up on rainy mornings like this. If you look closely you might see toe beans. (UBO = Unidentified Black Object) That would have to be Bella.

~~~

Photos posted on or around this date in previous years

Wordless Wednesday: Saturated Nap

Giuseppe is enjoying a nap saturated with color and comfort.

~~~

Basket Nap With Video

The yellow basket continues to be a favorite napping spot, and Giuseppe and Bean have been favorite napping partners since they were kittens.

Giuseppe kind of acts like the pillow while Bean likes to sleep in a ball, so he tucks himself into Giuseppe’s belly.

The yawn starts another segment of the nap.

I recorded just a short portion of the nap, doing my best to get the purrrrrr, so you might need to turn up your speakers.

~~~

Photos posted on or around this date in previous years

Blue Pitcher With Black Cat, 2013

Don’t be silly, human. Who would be interested in a photo of a dumb blue pitcher?

I think this is much better.

I have to say, I do like it, Mr. Sunshine, subtle, almost abstract. I have some talented cats here.

I also had way more photos of the blue pitcher with black cats in them than without.

This was the final photo I chose, without cats—just for jollies, even though no one would really want to see a photo of a dumb blue pitcher without any cats in it. I had my DSLR in my right hand and my left arm around Mr. Sunshine, Giuseppe and Mewsette on the cabinet, holding them against me as they struggled, and waving my right foot at Mimi and Bean on the floor to decoy them from jumping up. So I was standing on my left foot and doing the hokey pokey, and I don’t know why the photo is as clear as it is, or how I got the angle I wanted showing a bit of the table above it…

And don’t forget, you too can have talented photo assistants and feline art directors in your home—and I can vouch for the creativity of black cats. During Adopt-a-Cat Month, you can easily find your next interior decorator or social critic!

I first published this post on The Creative Cat in 2025.

All images and content are copyrighted and may not be used or reproduced in any way without my written permission. Please contact me if you are interested in using any of my content.

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July 17, 2025July 17, 2025

“I Will Always Walk With You” Garden Flag

I make several non-customized memorial gifts, some intended for sympathy and remembrance, and some simply as gifts for animal lovers that can be used as remembrances.

Every day I design, make and sell many different gift items featuring my artwork and photography—that’s how the votives came to be. People have purchased the non-customized gifts when ordering a votive or other customized remembrance isn’t possible or when they want a gift to give right away.

About the image “I Will Always Walk With You”

Original photo for "I will Always Walk With You" — Original photo for “I will Always Walk With You”

This particular design was based on a chance photo from a July morning in 2009 just three days after we lost Namir, and Cookie and I were out in our back yard, each doing our thing and remembering him, me racing from flower to glistening dewdrop with my camera.

They often followed or preceded me as I wandered. I happened to see my wet footprint and Cookie’s wet pawprints walking next to me on the flagstone path around my yard. Cookie and I were both missing Namir; he would have been with us on that morning, I feel he was.

Later that month I knew it had to be one of the set of sympathy cards I was designing and what text I’d use. I designed a few other remembrance items too.

About the “I Will Always Walk With You” Garden Flag

Flags are 11″ x 15″ and can be displayed outside in the garden or used indoors as a small banner. I print my flags on one side of cotton canvas duck fabric and stitch the pocket and hem. Cast iron flag stand is extra. Flags have been colorfast and resisted fraying for two years in just about all of my test yards around the country except where there’s been some wild weather. I’ve left my own out through the winter.

I was a little surprised at the popularity of this flag—I sell at least one at nearly every vendor event where I display my pet memorial gifts.

Scroll down to read about ordering a single flag or a quantity.

I make this flag in quantity because it’s also popular at my vendor events, so they can be ordered in quantity.
A single flag is $20.00 including shipping.
I can ship a single flag to your recipient with a note from you at no extra charge.

If you have an animal-related practice or business and want to order in quantity:

The first flag is $20.00, each extra flag is $10.00 each up to five with greater discounts for six. My price breakdowns are:
- one = $20.00
- two = $30.00
- three = $40.00
- six = $50.00

Order an “I Will Always Walk With You” Garden Flag

Visit Non-customized Memorial Gifts to order.

You can also read about Other Memorial Gifts, Animal Sympathy Cards and Commissioned Pet Portraits.

All images and content are copyrighted and may not be used or reproduced in any way without my written permission. Please contact me if you are interested in using any of my content.

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July 9, 2025

Great Rescues Day Book

In 2011 I published Great Rescues Calendar and Gift Book, a 16-month desk calendar that included a commissioned portrait of a rescued cat or cats for each month, plus more about the portraits, cats and rescuers in the back and information on cat care. But calendars go out of date and I knew these stories had to go on.

Great Rescues Day Book carries on the original idea in a way that’s much more permanent. This book is not dated for one year, but has all the dates in a month for you to fill in the birthdays, anniversaries, holidays and social and personal events in your life.

Great Rescues Day Book is spiral-bound and measures 8″ x 10″ to easily fit on your desk or in a purse, briefcase or backpack. While the original Great Rescues had a die-cut cover with the title stamped in gold foil, this has a solid 12 pt. printed cover for durability.

What’s a Day Book?

I’ve used a day book for over 20 years and have all the arrivals and, sadly, departures of each of my cats along with my friends’ weddings, my nieces’ births and the births of their children, the day I first registered a business name, all that sort of stuff, conveniently included in one place.

On the left is the featured portrait with the kitty’s story, below that the monthly fun quote of something feline. On the right is the month name with enough lines for all possible dates in that month. The holidays that are celebrated on a certain date are marked on that date, but ones that float, especially those Monday holidays, are explained at the bottom just to remind you that they also happen in that month. If animal-themed holidays are celebrated on a certain date, like Spay Day USA, they will also be included, but just the same if they are ones that float like Pet Memorial Sunday they will be explained at the bottom.

Here are the pages individually so you can open them and view them a little larger.

About the portraits

The portraits in this book, collected as a series, won both a Certificate of Excellence and a Muse Medallion in the 2011 Cat Writers’ Association Annual Communication Contest, as well as the 22 Cats Notepaper mentioned below.

Although Great Rescues Day Book is a 12-month book I am still featuring from the original calendar 15 of the portraits of rescued cats I was commissioned to paint over 20 years as an animal portrait artist (to that date), plus the portrait of my own which I consider my first, “Waiting for Mom”, below.

“Waiting for Mom”, pastel, 16″ x 23″, 1988 © Bernadette E. Kazmarski

That means you get a few pages in the center where you have only portraits and stories to enjoy.

While the portraits are lovely and I’m proud of my body of work, the stories of these cats, and the people who rescued them, is what compels me to share them with you. Each of the stories tells of cats from shelters and cats abandoned and saved, cats found inside car engines and cats reluctantly surrendered by people who could no longer care for them, but each one has a happy ending as a cherished companion in a loving home.

And while each cat has an individual story, each rescuer has a story as well of reaching out to an animal in need to bring it in from the streets. In many cases they helped heal physical and emotional wounds and gave that cat a lifetime of love, in return receiving love and devotion; often those humans received some healing in return they weren’t aware they needed.

The story continues

After the calendar pages I have a section where the stories are continued, either with more details or updates; I remained friends with all my portrait customers and received continuing news. I also have notes on how I created the portraits that weren’t included in the stories.

Resources for cat guardians

Following the calendar section and section of stories of the rescuers and their feline families I’ve included a mini cat-care book illustrated with my drawings. I based this information on the most frequent questions I field from people needing help with cats in any way, from finding strays or orphaned kittens, adopting for the first time or caring for a geriatric cat, a list of household toxins and toxic plants, or helping stray and feral cats and beginning with TNR.

Each book includes 10 sheets of my “22 Cats” decorative notepaper with a collage of all the portraits in black and white so you can make your own notes or write special notes to friends.

Each month on The Creative Cat I post the featured portrait, story and pages from Great Rescues Day Book and then describe the creation of the portrait in detail as well as even more history of the cats and the rescuers. You can browse here to read a few of the stories.

Here are images of the other portraits in the book—perhaps you’ll recognize a kitty you know!

All the portraits on the back of the book.

Purchase Great Rescues Day Book

Price includes shipping, and discounts for wholesale and quantity purchases.

If the book is a gift to someone, or you have a particular cat or cats in mind, I would be glad to add an inscription in the front of your book.

All images and content are copyrighted and may not be used or reproduced in any way without my written permission. Please contact me if you are interested in using any of my content.

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July 3, 2025

Silhouette at the Window Votive Lamp

A contemplative kitty sits quietly, looking out the window at the day.

I created the Silhouette at the Window design as another of my feline votive lamps collection but as soon as I added them to my display people bought them for themselves or others as sympathy or remembrance gifts. I can take the hint, and I can see why. So I’ve included them in my non-customized memorial gifts collection.

Silhouette at the Window Votive Lamp is a particular shape of upcycled jar, frosted outside with a black cut vinyl design and black glass paint embellishment, and offered in clear white or with blue, green or yellow transparent glass paint interior. All votive lamps come with a string of LED lights with a six-hour timer.

The inspiration and design of the Silhouette at the Window Votive Lamp design and product

I created the ink drawing that is the basis of this design way back in 1988, called Puck at the Window from a photo I’d taken in 1984, my roomate’s cat. You may have noticed in other feline art that cats at windows and the feline silhouette are favorite themes of mine, and you can see now it started early.

line art illustration of cat silhouette at window — The line art I created from the photo.

photo of cat silhouette at window — Puck at the window.

Its original intent was as a sympathy card for my veterinarian to use, but that never came to fruition. I’ve considered it in my own collection of sympathy cards, but I’ve also had many another idea for items on which I could use this design, most involving light, and most originating decades ago. One of the first was as a nightlight cover, then a suncatcher, eventually, of course, a votive.

Scroll forward to today, when I’m actually planning my votives, this design was top of mind for three years, from the time I started working them out. I could picture this design on one of the four-sided jars I use for my cat art votives.

But what was the best way to present it? I love the contrast in the black and white, but the labels I print for my glass items don’t quite capture that; the black isn’t dense enough and the edges aren’t completely sharp because the label has a surface texture. No, the labels are purrfect for continuous tone artwork, not line art.

I could hand paint it in the dense black paint I use for glass, but I know I wouldn’t be able to reproduce this design well enough without taking a lot of time to handpaint each one. Trying to stencil or screen print each one would be too cumbersome because of the shape of the surface.

But now…there’s vinyl to cut, with nice clean edges and permanent application, just perfect for an adaptation of line art with the interesting cat silhouette. I frosted the outsides of the jars so the glass exposed inside the vinyl design would have a matte finish while the permanent vinyl is gloss, giving it an extra dimensional interest.

I first introduced this design on a votive just in time for my 2021 Holiday Open House, as I’m so fond of creating a brand new item at the last minute for each open house and other events. That was also when Morty first had his urinary issue and I worked off my worry about him with working out this design while I kept an eye on him. I liked the way the original looked but wanted to make other adjustments and changes, and that’s what I worked out over the next few months. I made two to have at my events and was surprised they immediately sold. I’ve been making them since then, usually six at a time.

Four Silhouette at the Window votive lamps.

One of those refinements was adding color to the clear space. I liked the plain white, and the initial sketch was from a winter photo. But I could also visualize a blue sky out there, or a sunrise yellow, or even green for greenery. I will always make the plain white/clear, but I like the colors too. Up to now I’ve painted them on the inside, but I’m also working to see if the colors I use will be permanent on top of the etched surface.

Purchase a Silhouette at the Window Votive Lamp

Each of them comes with battery-operated string lights with a six-hour timer, and each has the original jar lid to keep the inside clean. You’ll also see that each one is a little different where the “leaves” are concerned in the design; those tiny pieces of vinyl don’t always stay where they’re supposed to.

Visit Non-customized Memorial Gifts to order.

Other Feline-themed Votive Lamps

Like everything else I make I’ve worked on the design and production of my upcycled glass jar votives, and one of the things was changing from small LED votive candles to LED light strings, with timers, so they are brighter and more colorful, and you can use them as lamps that turn on and off automatically.

They are made with frosted vinyl labels and embellished with glass paints and cut vinyl. Some of the jars may even look familiar as they are from spaghetti sauce, pickled things and condiments. I don’t mind buying new materials, but I also like to recycle, upcycle and reuse things when I can.

My feline votive lamps have a big variety of felines so you might be able to choose one that resembles the feline in question. Some of them are silhouettes or more abstract cat shapes, and some are collages of cats.

Visit the Votives Page in my Handmade Gift Gallery on Portraits of Animals to see the rest of the votives.

You can also read about Other Memorial Gifts, Animal Sympathy Cards and Commissioned Pet Portraits.

All images and content are copyrighted and may not be used or reproduced in any way without my written permission. Please contact me if you are interested in using any of my content.

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